watching the office with my roommate and processing the weeks so far, and all of what’s to come.
working one full time job after being an intern was always going to be a challenge- the delights of living away from where i work and having time and space and resources to do things other than work, combined with the expectations and demands of a job… but then to add another job… even ‘just’ 14 hours… well, it’s tough. it’s demanding, it’s challenging, it’s … tiring, exhilarating, stressful, it’s a lot.
and i think i’m slowly getting used to the work load and the responsibilities, i’m not sure that i’m performing to my capacity on either right now, i know i drop the ball on a lot of things… and sometimes my enthusiasm for anything else wanes in the face of the bone deep weariness that comes with the end of a particularly long work day or week.
but i know that that will change and that this will get better, that i will articulate my needs and fears and strengths and weaknesses and.. and.. and it will get better. i will get better at this. and at defending myself in this.
hmmm.
and now… grey’s anatomy. soooooo… goodnight. i will be back again soon.
