…on my mind

Posted: January 6, 2010 in life
Tags: ,

so, my friend Kelsey (an amazing woman who is living in Marghita and working with the kids in the orphanage in Romania that i’m part of a team doing camps for) wrote this post a couple days ago, and i read it yesterday, and although i don’t know any of the particulars, i do know a lot of the kids in that orphanage and i do know a lot of what they’ve gone through, because they’ve told me. and so, when i read this post yesterday, my heart almost broke. because these kids do not deserve the life they have been handed…

and so, when Kels says,

“So why even try God – what ARE we doing in Popesti? This stuff happens all the time. I know it. So what is the point – if it’s going to happen anyway what’s the point?
And, why? Why was I chosen to grow up where I did with the parents and family I had? Why was I allowed to have the education that I did? Why was I allowed to have an incredible set of friends, many who remain even today? Why am I allowed to go to sleep in safety each night in a warm apartment? Why am I allowed to wake up and put on clothes that don’t smell of body odor and bad hygiene? Why have I been chosen to succeed when they, by no choice of their own, have been set on a plan for failure?
Why?
Why am I allowed to have a relationship with Jesus like I do – have a Christian body like I do – have an amazing network of prayer, support, counselling and accountability like I do?
Why is there some who do and some who don’t?
I could have been one of those kids at Popesti. You could have been as well…”

i get this tug in my chest, like, heck, what ARE we doing? and then i think, i could replace Popesti with Camden. there are so many kids here that are broken and hurting, and though the situations are somewhat different, there is still a lack of Christ in a lot of lives, a a lack of hope, a lack of peace, and yet… and yet there is great compassion, great love, great vision. and then i think, well, instead of Camden, or Popesti, lets replace it with Glasgow… and so the circle keeps turning, and i feel like wherever i go next, whatever i do, there will be need, and my heart will be broken and … and …

and then Kels points us toward Jesus- Romans 5: “Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through Him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

“God HAS poured His love into me and created a HOPE THAT DOES NOT DISAPPOINT.
God HAS called me to let this overflow to the kids at Popesti orphanage.
He has called me to do this without knowing how, when or if ever it will create change in them.”

and so, i took heart from that, that it is not all bad, that although these situations may seem terrible, they are not hopeless.

all this to say, i am so glad to be in Camden right now, and so sad that i have to leave again on sunday. i’ve seen a few of my kids since i’ve been back, which is good, but hard, having to explain, well, yeah, i’m back but only til sunday, but then i’ll be back again.. (i should get visa confirmation or whatever on/by the 19th of this month….)

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Comments
  1. Suzi's Mum says:

    we’re blessed so we can bless others – it’s the grace economy :)

  2. kennyloo says:

    We may not believe all the same things but I reckon a lot of us believe in love and one way or another, we have to rely on that. I’m glad to hear that people take a moment to think about all this and struggle to find the words to describe just how fortunate we are, in every way. I’m rambling… just remember, hugs not drugs my love. :)

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